Love and Mayhem
by KatHarkness-Katara
Summary: In a world of fairy tales, magic and wonder, two rogue writers wreak havoc. Desperate to escape their puppet masters, unable to control their own lives, the Disney Princesses must unite against their unseen controllers, before an online feud drives their lands to ruin...
1. Chapter 1: Virginian Variations

**Love and Mayhem Chapter 1 Virginian Variations**

Pocahontas watched the galleon disappear. She waved a farewell, and the wind carried it to her departing love. When the ship was no longer on the horizon, she turned and returned to her people.

* * *

"_This won't do at all!" Freya Amore cried. "They were in love! How could they do that?! They can't be parted!"_

_She pouted, then turned off the TV and booted up her laptop. She opened a word document, and began to type._

* * *

"How long until I can return?" John insisted. "I cannot live without her!"

"Not long now, John," Thomas told him. "As soon as we fit the ship out and fill up on passengers, we can go. Unless the doctor changes his mind."

"He better not," John grumbled. He couldn't wait to return to Jamestown, the New World and the most beautiful girl ever, his Pocahontas.

"We'll we're starting to settle families," Thomas reminded John. "Pocahontas will have some good English company in Jamestown."

"I was thinking…we might live halfway between the tribe and the town," John said mildly. "Get the best of both worlds."

"Sounds fine," Thomas agreed. "I'd like to get a house and farm sorted, then settle down with a girl and some little ones."

"Children," John sighed wistfully. "A little girl with my hair and a little boy with hers. Wouldn't that be wonderful?"

"You're hopeless, aren't you?" Thomas said fondly to his former idol.

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"I have made my decision, father," Pocahontas announced. "When the ship returns, I will seek passage to England."

"My heart is heavy, dearest daughter," Powhatan sighed. "Are you certain your path leads away from us?"

"I don't know," she admitted. "But it points to him."

"You have helped show us the path of peace," he told her. "I greatly value your guidance."

"I'm sorry," Pocahontas sighed. "My heart is also heavy. I do not want to leave our lands, but I cannot be without John. I will ask if he can return, and I will follow wherever he goes, but our paths are meant to be one."

Powhatan looked at his daughter with regret and no small measure of pride. "Do not allow your heart to be torn or your spirit crushed," he said softly. "Always be my daughter."

"Wherever I go, whichever path I tread, it started here."

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The months passed, and the ship sailed. Seasons turned, and the Powhatan prepared for the loss of their princess. At last, the day came when the wind blowing through the village carried the shouts of sailors on its salty breeze.

Pocahontas rose and ran to the river. She jumped into her canoe, and set off downstream. Through the rapids, over the waterfall; she slowly neared the river mouth. Eventually she came out into the bay, and saw the ship.

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When the ship slid into the bay by Jamestown, John hung off the figurehead to look deep into the depths of the land. The he saw the small canoe, and his beloved.

He jumped, and swam through the cool water to reach the other boat. He pulled himself up, and Pocahontas' help, was soon standing upright.

He wrapped his arms around her. "Marry me," he whispered.

"Yes, John," she replied, and pressed her lips to his.

* * *

"**This won't do at all!"**

**Kali had only logged on to find her latest fix of blood and gore, and instead had found this outrage!**

"**I will end this, or my name's not Kali Mortem!"**

* * *

It did not take long for John and Pocahontas to set up house. They worked the land and kept the peace. It was perfect.

Until the day Pocahontas went to see her father, and never came home.

John went straight to Powhatan when his wife went missing. "Where's Pocahontas?" he demanded.

"I have not seen my daughter for nearly a moon," Powhatan retorted. "You have kept my Pocahontas from her people, white man. Do not search here."

"She said she was coming to see you!"

"She never arrived," Powhatan said simply. "Ask your own kind. We would never hide her from her path."

John let out a harsh sigh. "Of course. If you see her…"

"Perhaps misfortune befell her," Powhatan relented. "Come, let us search the way."

The two left the village and started back to the young couple's house. They examined the ground, but there was no sign of a nasty fall or a scuffle with a bear.

There was a flash of light. A figure collapsed to the ground. John and Powhatan hurried over. It was Pocahontas!

She was mumbling incoherently. Her arms were lined with blotches. "What have your people done?" Powhatan cried.

"My people? We're nearer to your village than our town," John retorted. He scooped up Pocahontas. "I'll be taking my wife home."

Behind him, Powhatan gnashed his teeth in anger.

"Demons," Pocahontas moaned. Blue and bright yellow-green. Three eyes…demons…"

* * *

_Freya wept inconsolably._

**AN: Welcome, folks! First off, I know Freya and Kali are terrible writers. Aside from basic stylistic weaknesses, Freya is obsessed with love, and Kali with death, destruction, and general mayhem. Enjoy seeing them fight it out! The next chapter should be in about five weeks.**

**Regular readers of my works: Today I'm also updating Wayne's Boys: Family Ties and Little Bird's Vengeance.**

**Next**** week: More Family Ties, more LBV, and the next installment of the reasonably popular Death's Avenger.**

**Please review, you lovely people!**

**Until next time,**

**Katara**


	2. Chapter 2: African Antics

**Love and Mayhem Chapter 2 African Antics**

**Kali had been infuriated ever since she read that drivel masquerading as fiction. Sure, she'd written her own piece to cheer herself up, but that had only taken the edge off. She'd have to do so more, with characters unaffected by this…soppy love thing.**

**She flicked through the DVDs her mother had bought in an attempt to 'reform' her. Finding a likely candidate, she smirked.**

* * *

Nala ran. In the year since she'd given birth to Kiara, and two years since she'd become Simba's alpha female, she'd rediscovered the joy of hunting. The antelope would make a nice dinner for her, Simba and their little cub.

She neared. Her prey wouldn't long escape her. Nala bunched up her leg muscles, preparing for the final pounce, when…

The earth collapsed beneath her.

She let out a roar of hock, descending to a yowl of pain as several wooden stakes pierced her.

She thrashed, trying desperately to free herself, but only succeeded in bashing her head on another stake. Half-stunned, she gave up, hoping desperately Simba would notice she was gone before she bled out.

* * *

"Zazu, did Nala return from her hunt this afternoon," Simba asked his hornbill advisor.

"I'm not sure, sire," the bird answered. "More importantly, the elephants report poachers taking pot-shots at them."

"Poachers? I see," Simba sighed. "Have the birds keep watch and report any humans they spy." He frowned, thought further. "Oh, and ask them to keep an eye out for Nala; it's not like her to be late home."

"No, sire." He flew off.

Simba headed back to the Rock. Poachers were quite a problem for the herds, and this latest bunch would have to be dealt with as soon as possible.

As he approached his home, his little girl-cub ran up to him. "Dad, where's Mom?" she asked innocently.

Simba smiled at her. "She's probably just having fun catching dinner."

"Okay," Kiara accepted. "Can I play with Zazu?"

"He's busy right now, but Timon and Pumba can help you find a snack," Simba suggested.

"Grubs?" Kiara said doubtfully.

"Slimy yet satisfying, remember?" Go on."

The cub scampered off, and her father sighed. He wished he had the same confidence in his own words. Before he could ponder any further, a crane swooped down. "Sire!" he squawked. "Your wife – Nala – she's in a lion pit!"

"Where?" Simba growled. The crane took off, and Simba followed. After several minutes, he came to the pit. "Fetch the elephants," he ordered. As the bird took flight, Simba roared quietly. Below him, Nala opened her eyes, looked up, and gave him a pain filled smile.

* * *

_Freya was throwing a tantrum – quite an impressive tantrum. After that – that – fiend! – had completely __perverted__ Pocahontas, she's taken solace in the fact the demon had mostly likely abandoned the magic of Disney. But it seemed not._

"_That poor lion," Freya wailed. After an hour or so, she mastered herself, and started to type._

* * *

Nala lay on a large, leafy branch that was acting as a stretcher. She was depressed; hardly able to move and constantly in pain all over, she was a burden on the Pride. The law of the jungle said she should be abandoned, and she couldn't help but wonder when Simba would finally leave her. Hopefully he'd let her say goodbye to Kiara first.

Hearing heavy paws approach, she feigned sleep. "Nala?" she heard Simba say gently. She stayed still in sham repose. Simba sighed, and started dragging Nala's branch.

After a time, Simba stopped. "Nala?" he murmured. "Are you awake?"

Deciding not to prolong the inevitable, she opened her eyes. "Yes, Simba, I'm awake. Are you leaving me now?"

"What? No," Simba said, shocked. "I will never leave you, Nala. I love you. I just wanted to show you how much."

Nala looked up, and saw that Simba had brought her to the river, where a bunch of logs had been lashed together to form a raft.

"I thought you might like a boat ride," Simba said tenderly. "Can you get on it yourself?"

"I'll try," Nala said. Hauling herself up, she staggered over to the raft, leaning heavily on her husband. He settled her down, then picked up a long stick and pushed off.

As they coasted down the water, Nala snuggled up close to Simba, grateful she had such a wonderful lover.

* * *

_Freya sighed, waiting for the feedback to pour in. That felt better. Now what else would settle her down?_

* * *

**Now Kali was the one throwing a temper tantrum.**

**AN: In case you haven't guessed, formatting this thing is a pain in the bum, and it's only going to get worse. Also, Kali is bonkers, and so is Freya. Don't expect much rational thought from them; I've based them on the worst stereotypes of fangirls. They don't actually exist (at least that I'm aware of; if you really are, or really know, someone called either Freya Amore or Kali Mortem, it's a coincidence).**

**Anyways, sorry I'm late.**

**Also this week, the next chapter of the surprising tricky ongoing arc in Flashback, and a bit of action in Black and Red. Next week, something really fascinating happens in Flashback, plus more Little Bird's Vengeance and Death's Avenger.**

**Freya isn't the only one waiting for feedback; please review!**

**Katara**


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